Double Emotions

April was an exhausting month. The birth of our daughter combined with the anniversary of the loss of our son took its toll on me. One great thing I learned was my ability to feel many emotions simultaneously. I could be completely and utterly delighted and devastated at the same time. I would be thankful for the blessing of my daughter and completely angered by the injustice of losing a child. Amazed by her life and torn that I missed out on similar moments with him. I can even admit to be being disgusted elbow deep in poop and feel so privileged for finally getting this experience.

Looking back on these double emotions I am amazed by how much strength and complexity as a human I have. Where would I be if Miss-E did not enter my world during such an emotional time? I hope to think I would not be brought down again by my grief but I think without her I could have been. I know now that my sadness will never fade and at times it may be all encompassing but it still allows me to see the light and feel the good in life.

Here is a picture from our photo shoot the other week with a dear good friend and a hounourary Auntie. Please check out her other pictures at PinkBlueberry Photography.