Cold

Are you warm enough son? Did we give you enough to play with? These questions plague me at times until the awful realization death is forever sinks in again. When he was born I did not want him to catch a chill, so on went his diaper, his diaper vest, his sleeper and his hat. Finally he was wrapped in two receiving blankets. To ensure he was not lonely he had two what we call “love flowers” and Sophie the Giraffe with him. The “love flowers” are simply plush stuffed flowers with faces. James won me one at Canada’s Wonderland and we always had it by the bed and to poke each other with and to smile down on us. I sent everyone looking for the flowers while I was in labour.


Before he was lowered into the ground I was assured by the funeral attendant that he had everything I gave him and was dressed and wrapped as I requested. It had been bothering me that he would have been in the autopsy room undressed, indignant and cold. The cold of winter upsets me for our visits are cut short and how cold his little body must be.

I would like it to warm up again to feel the warm sun on all of us when we go visit. Our next visit I will be giving him a stuffed red rose love flower.